She let me fuck her couple of times and then she fucked me with thestrap on. She was an energetic teacher and none of the things we didcould remotely be described as vanilla sex. She made me play the role ofa girl and that of a boy. She taught me how to respond in bed as a womanwhen she took the male role and how to understand when to call a halt ifthings began to get too scary.Several nights Fiona, Lisa and I went out together with me dressed enfemme. I was terrified the first time but as it became obvious that Iwas capable of not being ‘made’ as a boy dressed as a girl and insteadof passing as a girl, I became more and more confident in my newpersona.It became easier and easier for me to think of myself as a girl than asa boy. I was taking a selection of vitamins and pills prescribed by thedoctor, who I saw several times. Health care was, indeed, a fringebenefit and Vanessa insisted on everyone being clean of d**gs. Beingfound with d**gs in your system would result in immediate. I had a strong suspicion that something was amiss for weeks. She was strangely distant, the sex had dropped to almost zero, she had dates, of course “work-related” ones only, almost every evening, she suffered from wild mood swings, but refused to talk about it and seemed to stay away from me as often as possible.LAURA:Damn, Mercer is really worth nothing. Not only am I endangering my marriage for this, it is also pathetic. If it is no fun, it is no cheating, right? That’s ridiculous, Laura. I just hope my darling Tom never has to find out about this. I wouldn’t survive losing him or hurting him this way. While I start to dream about Tom, Mercer seems to notice my mental absence and starts to ram his pathetic little thing even harder into me. Shit, I somehow have to survive this ordeal. But somehow I’m also relieved that this is so unpleasant and that he’s such a pathetic lover, it makes the betrayal more bearable. If I would derive any pleasure from this, the guilt would kill me on.
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